Nathan
and I were on a little anniversary trip a while back and he asked me an
unexpected question. “So, shall we start
coming up with a list of dating rules for our girls?” He was only kind of joking. I’m glad that his protective Daddy instincts
are already pretty strong even though our girls are only 5 and 3! And I think it’s a good idea to put some
thought into something like this before you’re in the middle of it.
My
reply to his question was this, “I want the girls to make up their own rules
for dating.” And I wasn’t joking.
The
more I’ve pondered on this, the more I feel the weight of its truth so heavily.
I see more and more that parenting isn’t dealing with surface issues. It’s dealing with the heart. I want to do the
job with the fewest regrets possible.
When our kids are in their upper teens and are making more serious
decisions, do we want them to have to depend on us to know right from
wrong? Will they need us to explain to
them which are the wise choices? Please
don’t take this the wrong way. I believe
that communicating, talking, and getting wise counsel about the situations we
find ourselves in is essential, especially for a young, inexperienced person. I also realize I’m the mother of a 5 and 3
year old and I’ve eaten words before!
But hear my heart! My DESIRE, MY
GOAL, is to raise these girls into women who KNOW GOD. And this relationship with Him will guard their
hearts as they are led by His Spirit. I
don’t want to teach them how to be good.
I want to teach them how to be Godly.
So,
back to that Lion. Think about it. This is the system we use entirely too often. Especially in families and churches. We take the claws out of our Lions. We bind the mouths so they can’t possibly bite
because it seems safer. We are capable
of bringing those Lions into submission.
On the outside. But inside? IT’S A LION.
And a Lion wants to do what a Lion wants to do. Consider this. What if you could change the INSIDE, the
heart, of that Lion? That’s the kind of
Lion I that I want living in my house.
I do hear your heart, I DO! And I LOVE this line, "I don't want to teach them how to be good. I want to teach them how to be godly." That is so, so, sooooooo important and should underscore everything we do as parents. I have been thinking so much about parenting the last two weeks and it's all too much of a jumble in my mind to clearly say what I'm thinking .... maybe sometime. Thanks for sharing this.
ReplyDeleteAhh, Jessica. This is SOO good! Thanks for sharing it : ).
ReplyDeleteMy first response to the question was, "Id rather someone have claws along with a heart with feelings rather than they have no claws and no feelings." As a girl, I too often felt like people didn't care if I had feelings or not, all that mattered to them was that I didn't have "claws."
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